“Lucretia McEvil, Honey where ya been all night? Your hair’s all messed up, baby, and the clothes you’re wearin’ just don’t fitcha right…”
We’re now into Week Five of the NFL season. So here’s my current Lucretia McEvil roster. Teams that ought to look alluring, but just don’t look right at all.
Honey, where ya been all night?
Rams Coach Sean McVay is an offensive guru, right? So let me ask you a question. How many times in his tenure have we seen the Rams in a big prime-time game score exactly zero touchdowns?
The ‘Niners’ Nick Bosa says his team has the personnel to become the top defense in the NFL. He’s right. SF’s offense is going to be just fine, too. If you’re into the whole football X’s and O’s thing, no other offense in the NFL is as fascinating as SF’s.
Understand, I’m not conspicuously picking the 49ers to win the Super Bowl. But they are absolutely in the mix of teams who have a strong shot. So how is that front office going to handle business if Jimmy G. winds up hoisting the Lombardi Trophy? Would that be awkwardly wonderful or wonderfully awkward? We might just find out.
I love football. I hate injuries. I winced when I saw Monday’s list of casualties, which includes Cordarrelle Patterson, Javonte Williams and Randy Gregory.
Attention NFL fans. Stay where you belong. And don’t come over the middle into Bobby Wagner’s zone. It ain’t prudent.
So the Giants are gonna fly all the way across the pond to play the Packers and maybe have to start Davis Webb (who he?) at quarterback? This London stuff is so lame…
So if ‘Bama QB Bryce Young can’t go Saturday because of his injured shoulder, do the Aggies have a chance? The short answer, IMO, is yes.
Wonder how that pre-game bump between Saban and Jimbo is gonna go…
Here’s how many excuses the ‘Horns have against Au Jus. Zip. It wouldn’t be a good idea to blow this one, Sark.
So, yeah, we have Texas-Au Jus and Aggies-Tide coming up on Saturday. But have you checked out some of the other matchups? Tennessee-LSU. TCU-Kansas. Arkansas-Mississippi State. Utah-UCLA. Western Kentucky-UTSA. Washington State-USC. BYU-Notre Dame. Army-Wake Forest. Kansas State-Iowa State. Florida State-N.C. State. Dang! That’s an all-day sucker right there!