“There’s no way they win elections without cheating.”
I’m just pondering this compelling and even overwhelming “evidence” to support The Big Lie, as presented by The Big Liar himself yesterday in Arizona. Well, I guess that settles it…
COVID. Heat wave. Stifling humidity. And now a tropical storm heading for Tokyo. Big one, too. Nothing more fun and inspiring than the Olympics, right? Citius, altius, fortius. Dumber’n’dirtius.
137. No, that has nothing to do with a “medal count.” That’s the number of Games-related COVID cases in Tokyo. It’ll be twice that by the time you read this.
“Row, row, row your boat”? Not now. The rowing competition will be postponed. Why? I just told you there’s a tropical storm coming. Were you not listening?
I guess the IOC could move The Games to Big Bend National Park. All you have to worry about there is “acid shooting land lobsters” called vinegaroons, aka “whip scorpions.” They can shoot a spray of acid, but reportedly only if you really piss ‘em off. Peace through strength.
Did I ever tell you about the time I absent-mindedly left $54,000 in travelers checks in a men’s room at Big Bend National Park? No? I’ll get around to it.
I have the news on while I write. Just heard, seconds ago. I’m not making this up. Direct anchor quote. “There is no doubt that comedian Jackie Mason was unique. Now we are learning he is also dead.”
It’ll be Monday before you know it…